The Latest in Iranian Barbarity

"At that time it should have been finished. They should have punished her only once. Her documents say she is innocent. She paid for the crime five years ago." - CNN Article

This is one of the desperate cries of Iranian citizen Sajjad Mohammedie Ashtiani as he struggles to save his mother, Sakineh Mohammedie Ashtiani, from a stoning sentence imposed by he courts of Iran for alleged adultery.

Le Cirque Invisible

My first visit to the Beiteddine Festival today was just fantastic. I was lucky enough to be invited to attend the act put together by Victoria Chaplin (Charlie Chaplin's daughter) and her husband, French actor Jean-Baptiste Thierree in "Le Cirque Invisible" or "The Invisible Circus".
I have to say I was deeply impressed by their performance.

In a fine example of equilibrium, a rapidly alternating mood was established between the sheer quirkiness and light humored spirit of Jean-Baptiste's ludicrous but seriously amusing skits, and Victoria's more enthralling acting prowess; the audience never seemed to get enough, and wanted more, of both extremes. The show was an interspersion of skits by either actor alone; Jean-Baptiste Thierree lightens up the mood by playing a few magic tricks to funky music, and as he leaves the stage, Victoria Chaplin strides in with her more poetic and graceful performance.

She simply graced the audience with a masterful display of fluid, stepless movement and manipulation of props ranging from the simplest umbrellas to some of the most intricate mechanical devices I have ever seen on stage. Her fluidity in motion and her fixed expressionless face played perfect partner to an immersive musical score, a fantastic wardrobe, and precision lighting, in the creation of a truly psychotropic performance that left the audience hypnotized. Victoria's uncanny resemblance to her late father went beyond her facial features, with her beautiful acting and showmanship speaking volumes of Charlie Chaplin's legacy. With her 60 year-old body performing like a young athlete's, she made easy work of cable walking and some truly insane gymnastics and contorsion art to stun the audience even harder.
I had gone to Beiteddine expecting nothing more than a 'circus' and I was pleased to attend the fine act of precision choreography that is Le Cirque Invisible. Don't miss it.

Vuvuzelas, or Hitler's Tantrum

The interminable background buzz of a trillion bees is just getting too annoying!
If Adolf Hitler complains of this...... I loved the ending.



...

I thought it was cool at first, but as I watched more and more games, the headache grew! During yesterday's game between Denmark and Cameroon, there was this shot of the crowd and this huge group of Danish supporters. They were cheering and flailing their arms and flags around while there was a lone african fan in their midst, standing there, completely still, a Vuvuzela pressed against his pursed lips. Makes you feel like shaking the life out of him until that thing of death falls out of his death grip!!

Join bloggers's quests to get these annoying horns banned!! lol

Will Play for Tips

Hamra, Lebanon - June 2010

A pleasant sight and sound near AUH, where all we see all day are abused children begging you to give them money or buy lottery tickets. 

I have to sing for me to live

a job for me is out of reach

so come on by and hear a tune

I will sing for a bit of tips

Embarrassing Incident Turns Into Funny Encounter

There are few, very few, situations that are more embarrassing than having your fly break open while attempting to answer nature's multiple calls in a public restroom. Because what usually follows such accidents is you having to spend the rest of the day wondering how obvious it is, who's looking, and, if it's your first time, thinking to yourself "wow, the breeze, it's real!!" - especially if you're stranded like I was. Well that's what was going on in my mind on tuesday, anyway. At the Saab Medical Library at AUB, I was relieving myself in one of the stalls. And then it happened. It happened because I was too stubborn and somehow put too much force and - I'll spare the details, if you don't mind - I ended up hearing the sound. And then I knew... I thought "uh oh!"

Southpark: Too Far This Time?

I stumbled a cross this bit of news on CNN (Read News Article) reporting that Southpark creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker might have gone too far on one of their notorious skits on religion and major religious figures, by allowing one of their episodes to feature Muslim Prophet Mohammad wearing a bear suit.

"This is a show, after all, that once painted God as a gap-toothed rhinoceros-monkey, portrays Satan as a simpering milquetoast and regularly features Jesus as a superhero -- the kind who's not afraid to ignore the peaceful teachings of the Sermon on the Mount to smite his opponents. The show has mocked Jews, Catholics, Mormons, Scientologists and atheists, among (many) others." - CNN

I have been a fan of Southpark for years and years so this really caught my attention because, while I found their fun poking at religion and its figures was witty, hilarious, and as bold as one can imagine, I've always wondered when and how it would get them in trouble (and I'm laughing as I write this!).
So here it is! "Revolution Muslim" a radical Islamist organization and movement based in New York City that advocates the re-establishment of a structured Islamic state, terrorism in both the US and in democratic countries around the world, the removal of the current rulers in heavily Muslim populated regions, the destruction of Israel, and an end to what they consider 'western imperialism' - Wikipedia -- Is it just me, or does it sound a bit odd that this group would be based in NYC??? Excuse my digression! -- has taken offense at the portrayal of their prophet and has released a 'warning', or so they called it, to Trey Parker and Matt Stone, reminding them of the murder of Theo Van Gogh, who was killed in 2004 by an Islamic extremist. Among his works was "Submission, a short film about abuse of women in Islam. The release included pictures of Van Gogh's dead body. According to the group, however, this was in no way a threat but a mere warning of what might happen as a consequence of the airing of the episode.

I can't help but laugh at the wonderful work of the makers of Southpark. Of note was one representation of almost all religious figures in a group gathering, with Prophet Mohammad covered by a black square with the word "CENSORED" contrasting in white.

I am not sure about the repercussions of this and what they can be, or if any other movements with more power have taken more serious offense than Revolution Muslim. And if they have, how different would the reactions be in NYC as compared to the Middle East? I am also wondering about freedom of speech and how it applies in this case! How can groups be allowed to run around threatening people who don't live by their values?

Video From CNN

Thank You Ayaan - You are the first Muslim I have ever heard speaking with such objectivity.

Blind Item

I snapped this photo of the Lebanese Norwegian Cultural Week poster...
A funny twist!

What's Lebanon's Stance on Slavery and Racism Again??

So here's another lie us self-righteous Lebanese tend to force feed ourselves. We don't condone slavery. We turn our backs to racism. Right?

Think again...

To your right is a nice classified ad for the exchange of a 1991 Dodge for a Sri Lankan domestic worker.

Please read No Maids in the Pool.

[Edit:This is to clarify that the classified is NOT in a Lebanese paper].

What more do we need? how much more disgrace, how much clearer does this picture need to be for the Lebanese to just shut the hell up and realize that we are probably the most self-absorbed, superficial, and prejudiced (oh yeah the list goes on...) people on the face of this planet?

I can only try and say how dumbfounded I was when I saw that classified. And in light of the no maids in pool article I can tell that it's only a matter of time before we find a few like these in our Lebanese media.

I really thought I'd have so much to say about this matter, so much to talk about and criticize, so many questions and so much eloquent rhetoric. Instead, I have only speechlessness, disbelief, and shame. I am ashamed of my country, ashamed of being Lebanese. This shame is growing by the day, exacerbated by the fake, smug, and holy stance that the Lebanese take on these and other matters.

Lebanese people are a friendly, welcoming, and humanitarian people. Or so would the media say. Of Course they do not tell you the whole story. I will stop here, too disgusted to continue writing.

Modern Medicine and Cruelty... The Positives?

Read Cruel Discussion and Modern Medicine.

I've talked and talked and rambled on about the disillusionment one stands to feel during one's progression in physician training over the years. My avid readers will remember the "Ladies and Gentlemen, Your Future Doctors!" 'saga'. If you don't, check out Part I and Part II. (Does time fly or what?).

Anyways in the second part I go on about how you lose this sense of idealism, this cleanliness, if you will, that people commonly associate with medicine. Now some one and a half years down the line, this incident comes and reshuffles my perception of the world of medicine and what it all stands for.

In the OPD (Out Patient Department) we care for patients on a visit-to-visit basis. It is usually the least expensive form of healthcare, and so inevitably we get to see the less fortunate patients who are paying petty fees for consults with doctors in a high-ranking hospital. The ramifications of this, which I will save for another -long- post, and the experience of such 'encounters' sometimes shakes you to your core. The socioeconomic aspect that we never really come to face on the ward floors with high class (I hate to say it) patients is a rude awakening to say the least. So one of my last patients in the OPD Pediatrics rotation was K. an 11 year-old boy whose chart (We view charts before meeting with patients) said that he had growth failure. As I read more and more pages, and came across more and more test results and differential diagnoses, I got to the note that was written when K. had last visited the OPD clinic. At the time (some 2 years ago) he was diagnosed with Laron-type dwarfism. In brief, Laron type dwarfism (also Laron Syndrome) results from a mutation of the Growth Hormone receptor, and a subsequent Growth Hormone insensitivity leading to failure of growth due to severe IGF1 deficiency (IGF1 mediates the action of Growth Hormone).

The Visit

K. walked into the room and I immediately saw his prominent foreheaed (typical of the syndrome). To me he looked like a 4-5 year-old toddler, physically, and somehow even though I knew about his condition, I was still dumbfounded when he greeted me with a noisy low-5 followed by a firm handshake worthy of a grown man. Or when I heard his 11 year-old voice and his 11 year-old vocabulary. Or as I saw his 11 year-old movements manifest in a 4 year-old body. His 11 year-old self confidence, assertiveness, and demand of autonomy also struck me as he insistently forbid his mother from answering my questions for him. I think I've stressed it enough, it was one hell of a surprise, despite the fact that I knew about it.

K. was without a doubt the most pleasant patient I've had during this rotation. He had a persistent contagious smile that revealed a set of run down, crooked and decay nibbled teeth. He made jokes, played with my stethoscope, and everything else he could find in the room. The whole interview and physical exam took place in a light atmosphere and in the best possible conditions. NOT to be soon forgotten.

Of The Sadness of Reality
One promising modality for the treatment of Laron Syndrome is recombinant IGF1 (marketed under the name Increlex in the U.S.), which can bypass the action of GH on its deficient receptor, thereby restoring growth satisfactorily if treatment is initiated in a timely fashion.
Sadly, Increlex is unavailable in Lebanon. And apparently it is a very expensive drug, which as you might have concluded makes it a problem for an OPD patient struggling to pay even the LBP 10,000 OPD fee.
As documented in K'.s chart, K.'s mother was told about this treatment when they had last visited OPD. She was also told that it was not available and that there was no way she could afford it even if it were. She was coming a couple of years after that visit in the hope (in her own words) that "Dr. N had something new for her and her son".
- Dr. N: There still are no significant efforts to market the drug in Lebanon.
- Mother: Oh.
- Dr. N: As I told you last time we are trying but your son's condition is so rare that it's hard to find proper treatment here. And the expenses would be just impossible.

Dr. N once again sent K. and his mother home empty-handed. I could not tell whether the expression on the mother's face was one of disappointment, helplessness and resignation, or of expectation.

My Reactions and Thoughts

I was deeply saddened by this outcome and for a brief moment I felt helpless and ashamed that we had to send a patient home after telling him in no uncertain terms: "there is a drug for what you have, we're sorry but you just can't have it". So what are the issues here? I mean after stepping out of that personal, humane, human, emotional roller coaster ride of a first reaction, what are the circumstances that need to be discussed?

We hear a lot every day about how medicine has been commercialized to a degree where incidents such as these are possible. We also hear about how shameful it is that medicine is a financially driven institution. And what we hear most are the sad individual stories such as the one I've told you in my long and by now surely boring account. But what is the bottom line? If anyone knows me they know I'm a bottom line kind of person. So what is it in this case?

Well the bottom line, stripped of all emotion, all sentience, and all humanity, is a sad realization that money is and always will be a major, major factor in the drive for research of all kind. Putting all of this baggage aside, a patient is buying a product (in this case a drug that is the result of years and years of expensive research and trials), in order to use that product for personal reasons.

This is how impersonal and desolate the bottom line of modern medicine has become. And to me that's all that matters because there simply is no point trying to discuss how and why it comes down to this. So is it correct to assume that my disillusionment has surpassed all the good that medicine has brought and is bringing to this world? That in the end it can be boiled down to a simple transaction between a care provider, a pharmaceutical company, and an ill person?

The answer is a resounding NO. To me there is always a positive side to this. One positive side that will not be affected by the source of motivation of pharmaceutical companies, is that no matter what happens, medicine will always strive toward a common goal. And that common goal (besides, of course, the financial rewards) being what it is, which ranges from the curative eradication of disease to the palliative nature of the most trivial of pain medication, I can confidently say that medicine does more good than harm.

Sure, unfortunate patients will benefit less than others and K. here is a prime example. But if we consider the long term outcome of the situation, we are hard-pressed to see that had there not been this monetary incentive for research, Increlex would have probably never seen the light of day! But the bottom line is that it HAS. As a result of this, we HAVE a drug, it IS helping SOME people and maybe one day this drug WILL be available to everyone. I will go out on a limb here and say that an inevitable period during the life of this drug (and this applies to all drugs and forms of medical treatment or diagnostic tools one can think of) when it will be administered in a discriminate fashion among patients is only an obstacle, a hurdle that we will overcome in our drive toward global availability and affordability of the drug. This situation now is better, in my humble opinion, than not having any drug at all, and I would be surprised if anyone argues otherwise.

Sad. But true.

Brilliant Recap on Religion

Came across this skit by George Carlin on religion and its shortcomings.

I know some of what he says may be a bit disrespectful and his language might be a bit raunchy. But look past this and you'll find a good argument. And a funny one!

I somehow identified with Carlin on this one. I was never a believer. Since childhood, and since I could remember having any sense of logic and my own opinion on a few things in life, I just couldn't get myself to accept the dogmata of religion. There always seemed to be just too many discrepancies, to many dissonant axioms for me to just believe blindly. And let's face it, blind faith is the requisite in this department.

So what Carlin says in this skit summarizes (very briefly) my views on religion.

One thing though is that I've always been sincerely respectful of people's beliefs, as I've said in earlier posts; what drives me out of my mind though are people who use the 'faith argument' in discussions to try and convince people of the validity of the God Theory and all that it entails. These are the only instances where anyone will hear me badmouthing religion (and not spirituality).

Yesterday was holy Thursday and I tagged along with milady and a few friends for the traditional 7-Church visit. "This isn't tourism", smiled L., who was all too aware of my views on the matter, "you should have some thoughts, maybe say an informal prayer here and there!"

The thing is, there were many, many thoughts entering my mind at the time. At every church visit, every time I walked into a church since I was a kid, I would start thinking and thinking. Wondering, asking myself questions. Questions and thoughts about how people seemed taken and immersed in their belief, and the sense of their trance-like state. Every time, the experience is touching to say the least. And every now and then, I felt like one or two of my thoughts were of my family and loved ones, and these were the thoughts that I felt were somehow 'emitted' or 'sent off' without me necessarily wanting them to, in some raw and random hope that someone really is up there. But... you know the rest. These feelings and thoughts never consolidated into anything more powerful and for me, I don't know. I guess something more compelling will have to happen for religion to have a better chance with me. Don't ask what.

So please for those of you who will view this video, don't be outraged and blinded by a few bad words and scream blasphemy!

A Late Rite of Passage

Walking on Bliss street had never been such a complicated task, what with all the 10-year old –or less- mendicants and lottery ticket ‘agents’ or shoe cleaners. For the longest time I felt annoyance at the heavy task of brushing off these pesky and persistent solicitors that seemed to be after nothing other than your money. The annoyance not circling around the money itself, but about the ethics and principles of discouraging the presence of alms-askers and the associated child abuse and whatnot; let me not digress and wander off into these treacherous discussions for now.

So one of my tricky walks along the famous street, while I was looking for that after lunch cup of coffee, got me to Epi D’Or. -Don’t let the name “Epi D’Or” fool you. Fancy name for a place that’s affectionately and more commonly called “Abou Naji”, the little store across the street from the AUB main gate-. Waiting for my coffee, I get elbow-tugged outside by an as-yet unknown figure who turned out to be one of Bliss’ seasoned shoe cleaners

. “Here we go”, I thought to myself. But then, all thought processes angled at getting rid of that annoyance were instantly stopped by the cleaner’s marketing skills… “Eza ma 3ajabak ma tedfa3 wala lira!” Translation “If you don’t like my work don’t pay a dime!”

Said in a convincing and confident tone, these words made me think ok what the hell? My shoes were dirty, hadn’t been cleaned in a while and a good buff would do no harm! So I told the guy to do a good job and he got to work. I have not seen hands move so fast. The sound of swishing as his run down piece of tissue carved through the air and onto the now polished leather told the tale of a shoe cleaning veteran with years of training!

All done, shoes shining, and face smiling as M. took a few snapshots of the event, I was thinking about the going rate on a premium job like this! So I thought 3,000 LBP. M. frowned in disagreement and so I gave him 5,000 LBP.

In retrospect, seeing how his face lit up as he tugged on that bill and all the good wishes for prosperity and long life I got at that time, I know I overpaid! But I would do it again and pay the same price!

But hey. An honest living, a job well done, make me rethink my stance on the good shoe cleaners out there! This is one rite of shoe-cleaning passage not to be soon forgotten!

Cab Ride of the Year... In the Hamra Traffic

Over heard or made to hear...

On the way to pick up my car from the workshop where it had been for some maintenance...

Cab driver picks up phone, dials a number, and puts it to his ear. The short of a one and a half minute conversation: "Eh hayete yalla khallaset liom, jeye 3al beit la nodhar ma3 el wled" Translation "Hello honey I'm almost done for the day. I'll be home soon and we can take the kids out."

Cab driver hangs up.

*5 seconds pass*

Cab driver picks up phone, dials [what is obviously] a different number, and puts it to his ear. The short of a 3-minute conversation: "Eh hayete. Layke ma rah e2dar shoufik liom mdahhar marte w wlede. Wlek *Interrupted* Wlek shou bou rasik ma 3am tefhame ya mara?!! Ana ma3 marte ou3a tehkine ente. ANA behkike shou fhemte>!!>? Bshoufik boukra khalas boukra fhame ba2a!!"

Translation "Hello honey. Listen I can't see you today, I have to take out the wife and kids. I hav...*interrupted*... I ... What the hell is wrong with you woman?? Can't you understand?? I'm with my wife and kids tonight. Whatever you do don't call me. I will call YOU, understand!!? I'll see you tomorrow!"

Cab driver hangs up, looks at me with an arrogant smile, and says "Kif baddak tlahhi2 neswen? kif? Wehde w tnen w tlete, w ba3dein??

Translation "How can I keep up with the women? how? One, two, three women, and then what??

Help me decide whether this is funny, or outrageous, disgusting, and sleazy.

I could not believe my ears.

First LVAD implant in Lebanon - The misconceptions surrounding a highly successful operation

"A team of AUH surgeons has successfully carried out the first artificial heart implant operation in Lebanon, saving the life of a 37 year-old man and father of four".

That is the claim of many renowned media sources in Lebanon. Click here to read the official AUB article by Maha al-Azar.

I'm currently, and incidentally, on the Cardiothoracic surgery rotation at AUH. Yey me. I was surprised by a phone call on Thursday night and a friend screaming at me for not telling them that the first "Heart Transplant" in Lebanon was performed at AUH. Shocked, I thought to myself, there's no way I didn't hear about that one!! Then came another call, another newspaper article, another overheard conversation... All with one, or two, or three things in common... The misconceptions, the misconceptions, and the misconceptions. I just thought there were too many scientific blunders on the part of the media and their reports have been massively misleading at best. The following is a roundup of the misconceptions I thought people should be aware of...

Misconception 1 - This is NOT a Heart Transplant...

...And even if it were, it would not be the first one in Lebanon. The first heart transplant in Lebanon (a real heart transplant) was performed at the Hammoud hospital in 1999. Click here to read about that.
This is an LVAD, or Left Ventricular Assist Device (more on that later) implant. The original heart is still in place!

Misconception 2 - This is NOT and Artificial Heart Implant...

This is an LVAD (Click here), NOT an artificial heart. Let me explain. An LVAD, as its name implies, is a pump that merely assists the biologic heart in its function. It neither takes over its function nor does it replace it or completely take over its role. It ONLY assists it in its function by taking some of the work off its back... The biologic heart is still in place, functioning properly with the help of an assistant, if you will.

The implanted LVAD.

An Artificial heart, the Jarvik.

In contrast, an "Artificial Heart" is... well... an artificial heart! It is a complete heart-like pump that replaces the biologic heart, which is taken out of the patient on the OR table. It is still an experimental technology with only limited success in the United States.

Misconception 3 - This is NOT a life-saving device...

The AUB article also states that the operation saved the life of the 37 year-old patient. I am sad to point out that this is not the case. An LVAD implantation is what we call a "bridge to recovery" or "bridge to transplantation" procedure. This device is designed to help keep cardiac performance at an acceptable level for a limited amount of time pending one of two events:

- The recovery of a mildly diseased heart as a result of decreased workload afforded by the LVAD: Bridge to Recovery.
Or:
- The availability of a matching donor heart for transplantation: Bridge to Transplantation.

The LVAD used in this case was the Heartmate II by the Thoratec corporation and is claimed by Thoratec themselves to be able to provide circulatory support for only up to ten years. Now keeping in mind that these ten years are the result of the most optimistic and optimized calculations, it is clear that we should be expecting 5 to 10 years, more realistically, before there is a need for a new intervention. And we would still be optimistic in that we are neglecting all the possible complications that the poor guy could face.

I am not trying to rain on anyone's parade, and least of all the patient himself or the thousands of others with heart problems. I just think it's a shame how the media are having a field day with his story and modeling it, be it willingly or unknowingly out of lack of scientific knowledge, to fit the textbook picture of a world-class achievement in medicine, or that of the wonderful doctor or hospital saving lives by the millions. That this life has been saved is simply not true, and while I am truly ecstatic that this operation took place where I work, and even more ecstatic to see its success and the time it gave our 37 year-old father of four, I cannot emphasize enough how much of a temporary solution this is for our patient, who is, at the end of the day, whom we should think about before anyone or anything else. I can only hope he and his family know what the future holds for them.

This is a milestone in the practice of Cardiothoracic surgery in Lebanon, one that I am proud to witness during my young career. I just can't stand it being taken out of context in this manner. The authors of these articles and their sources shoud be reviewed.

Dear Sarah...

I came in and you were there. I sat at the table and you were around.

With your fresh looks, you stood out from the crowd. With your enticing smile, you caught my eye. There is something about you that played with my mind all night. Is it that smile? is it your hair? Or is it just as simple as your being at such odds with all of our dearly held ideals, self-ordained stereotypes and mundane ideas and clichés of the laws of attraction, that I just couldn't let it go?

So I told you. And from that moment, you knew my secret. You blushed and smiled. I did the same.

I was struck, and I knew so little. At an unfair disadvantage. But I will brave it.

I told you, and it wasn't that simple. He has your heart.

It's not to be. Not for now, maybe not ever. Or maybe...

Thank you for a pleasant night.

Elections, Lebanon, What do we really need?

For many months now, but mostly in the few days leading up to today, election day, we've all heard and seen countless ads, slogans, rebuttals, petty claims of corruption and some of the best and worst publicity we'd ever seen. I've hung out with people from all parties, listened to them discuss the elections, and what the other clan was up to. What they meant with this or that phrase, and what the hell they were thinking. Then I realized the disparity between what was at stake, and the level at which the discussions, verbal clashes, and even thinking were taking place. In fact, there was a distinct lack of mention of Lebanon in all these discussions. What the future held, what the REAL plans were for this country of ours that we're losing piece by piece. Instead, everyone was ecstatic when their clan rebutted the other clan's allegedly failed or misplaced ad. Everyone couldn't stop laughing and smiling when they heard their chief's distinct horn pattern. Keep in mind, that in arguing about the ads, and from a truly objective standpoint, both were right and wrong at the same time, but let's not go into that right now, because I think the arguments given by these people are too stupid to be a part of this post.

This brings me to the point I'd like to make. A point I and very few around me have been trying to get through. Also, I've been meaning to write about this here, but I have to admit that my lack of a respectable knowledge of politics has prevented it. I've often wanted to discuss and critique many key points that would come up on the news here and there, things my friends and I have talked about, but I never got around to it, because I never thought I'd be able to do it with enough substance. All I know is that the country's still being led by the same political leaders, thieves, murderers, and warlords that made it the shit hole that it is today. All I know is that their devoted followers are so goddamn blind that all they care about is how catchy their new slogan is or how humiliating that new advert is to the other clan. All I know is that this country is losing its youth, losing all its intellectual resources, and all I know, me, and my limited and stupid brain, is that there must be a reason behind this. There must be something that's being done that's preventing improvement, and leaving our problems like an open wound on an arm, gathering all kinds of infections, dirt, and parasites, to the point where amputation becomes the only viable option. All I know, is that very few people, if any, -and I am most definitely NOT a part of this few- can rightfully claim to have even the slightest idea on how to heal our country.

I came across something the other day that would do all this much better than I'd ever be able to. B. (My Marmite Guy) pointed out a video to me, a compilation of opinions and rants, denunciations and regrets expressed by a few prominent Lebanese personalities.

I will only post the trailer here, but please visit the link below and watch the whole thing. This is NOT some loser video with nothing but complaints and rants. It is a documentary and it starts and ends on a positive note, emphasizing hope rather than despair. I watched all three parts and each shook me to my core.

For the love of Lebanon, for the love of our future, please wake up.

Watch entire movie.

TRAILER

Adultery... Punishable by Death?

"At least eight women and one man are reported to have been sentenced to death by stoning in Iran.The group, convicted of adultery and sex offences, could be executed at any time, lawyers defending them say."

See the BBC article.

I heard about this on the drive to Beirut this morning. Not much was said, and I barely caught it on the radio so I wasn't sure what I had heard.
Now I'm reading about it and the more I read the more disgusted I am. I find it so difficult to believe that in the 21st century, we still hear about these sorts of things. Here are a few things I came across here and there while trying to satisfy my curiosity.

A Rude Awakening...

Sitting on a bench on campus, doing some reading in the morning, and someone comes along to share wisdom. Happens every day? Not like this.

That someone was K., one of the AUB campus cleaning troops -I call them troops because the thought of how monumental the task of cleaning a university campus this large just baffles me.

So how to describe K.? The best way I can put it is to say that he reminded me of Abou Kamal from a while back. A bit younger, but the same expression, on a weary, yet friendly face that has seen so much, so many students, doctors, and professors passing by, most surely too proud to make eye contact, but a welcome few nodding in acknowledgment. The roughed up skin and the snow-white hair again spoke volumes on his behalf, like they did for Abou Kamal.

So as K. walked up to me, and after a friendly "Saba7o estez" ("Good morning sir") asked me it was OK for him to pick up a few spent paper cups left around my bench. "Of course" I replied, and with a few swift picker upper moves worthy of the seasoned veteran that he is, he had cleaned up the area. When he was done, he looked at me and went on a long tirade. He opened with: "oh yes, son, education will give you your life". And from there he went on to tell me his story. Here's what I can manage to translate for you.

I've seen K. around campus many many times, as -apparently- he's worked at AUB since years before I even graduated from high school. He comes from a poor family of 9 children (if I remember correctly), and he talked about how his father could barely afford their everyday expenses, let alone provide them with a proper education. K. was out of school at a very young age, and had gone away against his dad's will to try as he could to get decent jobs here and there. Cleaning, construction, he had done it all by the time he was 18. He had started out at a construction site near the Golf club at Ouzai. 

After a quick biography, K. ended his speech with words that I will not ruin in translation. I was looking at him, and I was lost for words. What do you say to something like that? For a split second, I imagined myself saying how much it sucked to still be a student at my age, or how bad we medical students had it, but this was a brief moment of imagination. Very brief. How inappropriate! I don't remember what I ended up saying, but it was nothing too meaningful, as I blathered out  some insipid philosophical statement about life and how there's always worse off people.

So there I was, thinking about how I (and we all do) had been taking everything for granted. All I ever did was whine about how hard it was to grow up, how bad it was that we had to study for our stupid exams, and it suddenly hit me that I had never really stopped to think about what a blessing it was to actually be learning. I mean I have always loved learning, and wouldn't have it any other way, but I had never thought about it under this light. The difference in perspectives between myself and poor K. at that moment struck me silly (I do NOT mean to say that I felt pity for K. or that I felt superior in any way so please don't misunderstand me). 

This conversation reminded me immediately how quickly and deeply we get cocooned in our entourage, our environment, our everyday silly worries, whatever these may be, in such a way to somehow completely forget about the more unfortunate, the less fortunate, and about what real problems other people may be worrying about, and how disproportionate, if that's a right word to use, these two worlds are. 

This has been a learning experience by itself. Talking to K. felt like a shot of wisdom and perspective on life from the least likely source, and I'm going to keep it, even if I know for a fact that next year (which starts in 2 weeks), I'm going to be whining about the difficulties of medical training, about how people drive like cattle in this country, or how I can't seem to find time to go out for drinks and dinner. But one thing's for certain, K. will be on my mind when I do and I'm sure the thought of it will slap some sense back into me.

This could not have happened at a more appropriate time, for reasons that I will not discuss, and this has made me think about the whole "it's a sign" or "it's meant to be" philosophy, which as I've commented on Posh's post (read it and you'll understand), I am completely against. Nothing has changed in that department, but it got me thinking.

Overheard

Two guys in the gym...

Guy 1, with the heaviest Lebanese Americanized accent- "Yeah yeah man, I studied really well for this exam" so it's like.... akhou ekhta ya3ne!!!!
Guy 2 - "Jnoun"

hahaha gotta love it!

One Gets to Thinking...

Hey it's been a while! Been a long couple of weeks in the fast lane. That's the worst when you realize that all this time was supposed to be cooling off time... Things are a bit calmer in academic life, ergo you have more time for yourself, your blog, you know, the usual free time stuff... But no, I don't know why, but things have been different lately. I don't mean to sound like a broken record, but time is just flying away, and I've been realizing that more and more acutely lately... And, apparently, it's not because of studies and workloads. I don't like this...
So I've been trying to muster some stuff to blather about on here a couple of times over the past few days... Struggled with a bad case of blogger's block I guess. That is, until I found myself alone in a borrowed apartment, and there's nothing like that to get the ideas flowing...
So it's a cool small flat in Hamra, and it belongs to a very close family friend, C., who is away on vacation. C., knowing how much I struggle with the daily commute, the daily parking hassle/expenses, kindly and generously offered to lend me her place for a few days. Much appreciated. Previously a skeptic, I now know and understand the blessing that it is to have a place close to where one works/studies. You can wake up an hour later than usual and come home an hour earlier. You can come home for lunch, for a midday shower if you feel too sticky in the summer heat, it's just amazing how different and easier everything seems to be.
The first time I walked into C.'s apartment, I loved the colors, the black leather couches, the rugs, and the mixture of European and Middle Eastern influence in the choice of furniture and wall decoration. Look at one wall, you see an artisan mirror with Arabic calligraphy. On another, a beautiful Cézanne. In the living room, beautiful copper ware on a traditional wooden table seems to match perfectly with the modern tiling.
C. is a French immigrant, working in Lebanon as a French teacher in a prominant school. Her culture and background are vividly depicted in her choice of furniture, books, and art. When I asked M., she said it was obvious that whoever lived here was a foreigner. So many Eastern articles just screams it I guess... But C. has found the perfect balance between these and leather couches, modern flooring and colorful curtains and lighting. I love this place. C., Merci Beaucoup de ta générosité :)

So here I am, wasting more of my time, typing away on a soft couch, soft rock playing in the background, as I ponder what tomorrow and the days after that hold. The studies, the family's finances, the lovelife and whatnot, one watered-down glass of whine at a time... I need to live alone again.

I Got Marmite!!

About fifteen years ago I was introduced to Marmite, a pungent-tasting spread that can be had with just about anything from cheese, vegetables, to peanut butter on butter toast. It’ll spice up anything you can throw at it! The first time I tried it I was in Cyprus as a guest at a friend’s place. Breakfast was cereals and milk, fried eggs, grilled toast, and there was this funny looking little jar with a funky yellow cap. “This is marmite, the mom said, it’s a bit strong, but it goes well with peanut butter and toast!” I’ve always liked strong tastes so I took her advice. The chemistry was amazing, and It’s been a love story ever since! I came back to Lebanon and slowly forgot all about Marmite until it came up in a microbiology class a couple years ago; I was astonished and fascinated to learn that Marmite was actually a yeast extract and a by-product of beer brewing. Flash forward 2 years, one of my expatriated friends, B., who's living in London flew in for a 2-week vacation. Wouldn’t you know it, I – and a couple of my friends who got infatuated with the idea of Marmite before even tasting it – were begging him to get us a couple of jars 10 days before his flight. It was a thing of mystery for them. I had built it up so much!

I got an email from B. describing the reactions of the people around him back in London. A couple fought over it for a while as he stood and laughed, listening to their eloquence in describing their love/hate of Marmite.

-Girlfriend: “Is that Marmite in your hand?”

-B.: “Yes why?”

-Girlfriend: “and you do know it tastes like sticky shit right?”

-Boyfriend: “Oh no no don’t listen to her! I think it’s great!!”

-Girlfriend: “Oh my God it’s shit! It’s a complete waste of toast!” […]

-B.: Laughing.

So there’s no question about it. Marmite is definitely something you either love or hate. And during our little degustation session at a local eat-in, the reactions to the pungent taste and dodgy smell made that all too apparent. Some hated me for raising their expectations so much (yes, they took it personally haha), others were more pleased… And then we realized that the company had a website, we visited and its love or hate turned out to be a worldwide dispute. Strong feelings either way:

Found under the “Squeeze Me” section: “Eat Marmite? You don't just want to eat it, you want to bathe in it, wallow in it like a hippo in mud, slather yourself from head to toe and wrap yourself in bread and butter... And you know what? That's fine. Just fine. Completely normal in fact...”

Found under the “Squash Me” section: “Eat Marmite? You'd rather rip the wings off live chickens. You'd rather be stripped naked in public. You'd rather swallow rat's tails and snail shells... Enough already! We get the picture. And yes, you're in the right place...”

So the next time you’re in London, Cyprus or wherever, or have someone flying in from there, make sure you ask for a jar of that little mixture of heaven and hell. You owe it to yourself to try it, and decide if you have the guts and taste buds for it. And who knows, maybe we’ll be importing it soon. Just make sure you research the recipes, their website is hilarious.

Just be careful with the dosage, it’s some strong sticky shit you’re dealing with!